you know, there are some silly things that stick to your mind?
like there was once one fella told me he always buys tissue paper in twos (two packets)
he said there was once in his school days he got involved in a gang fight. he got cut on the head and was bleeding profusely with blood trickling down his face. he thought to himself: "Fuck, i think i'll need 2 packs of tissue (paper) to stop this bleeding". off he went with his bleeding head and with blood trickling on his face to a mama stall to buy 2 packs of tissue (paper). to his surprised, he used only one pack of tissue (paper). from that day on, he always buys them in twos. you know, that is something that sticks to the mind.
are you getting annoyed with (paper) in brackets? we say tissue when we mean tissue paper. isnt it so?
anyway, i had wanted to take a photo of my car to show you all. then i remembered my cousin saying with a LOT of conviction that to take photos of your vehicles is damn *suay* (aka bad luck) and your car will be involved in an accident, big or small, but sure langar or buang or something. of course i didnt believe it cos it is bullyshit, but it did make me hesitant to take a picture of my car. but me being me, will always want to challenge things went ahead to take a picture one fine day. after that, i was sitting in the car, half expecting an accident. wah lau, can be so silly right you say. ya so silly. then my very clever husband left the keys in the car after locking the car manually (the remote lock sometimes doesnt work). and best part, the auto car lock works very efficiently. 1 minute after you close the doors, it will auto lock. so anyway we were in a hurry and were at a hourly rate car park and got no damn keys. my very clever husband asked me to pick the lock. PICK THE CAR LOCK! freaking think im so clever, if i can pick a car lock i'll be out with too fast too furious team and go shop for cars for free man. i'll be king. i cant bloody pick the car lock for goodness sake though i can pick many other locks but it takes a bloody long time to pick a lock and i dont like to do it. so anyway, he asked me to pick the lock in a matter-of-factly manner. and i actually tried. a bit silly to even think i can. i thought to myself:"wah lau, really take photo of your car will get into trouble mei? so choon ar?" i thought. then i told myself, cannot be, must be a way out. and we started looking around for a metal rod that is flat, like a long metal ruler. luckily there were 2 contractors around (they were retro-fitting a retail shop on a Sunday). we asked for their help. they gave us a locksmith's number but they bloody charge $100 for the job. my husband said to break the glass. !!!! mad man break glass. i said no way. how to clean up the mess later? i said replace glass also got to pay, might as well get locksmith. but we continued to search for mental rod. to my amazement, we opened the lock the movie way. you know in movies, the crooks steal cars by inserting a long metal rod from the window pane? it's true, it works. we just pushed the rod into the slot to find the catch of the lock and "click"! voola! the door opened. all this in 3 mins. i mean the slotting the rod part. finding the rod and walking around thinking for solution took 20 minutes. so, ya, we did it the too fast too furious way. dont try it unnecessarily. im only telling you in case your keys got locked in and you dont have a spare and you dont want to break the windows and you dont want a locksmith, you can try it my way if that happens. that's all.
Monday, April 11, 2005
Tuesday, April 05, 2005
Thursday, March 24, 2005
Shaha-ying
i've not heard of shisha but when my friend described it to me, i was like, wow cool! we can do this in singapore? i was wondering to myself if it is a borderline activity that is kept so low profile that ive not heard of.
then came the highly anticipated shisha.
it looks glorious, with lots of accessories, sparkle, in a green glass and a long suspiciously looking tube. the waiter distributed to each of us a personal filter.
(so that you dont suck on each other's saliva)
the waiter asked if we want the normal tobacco or the premium one.
we ordered one each. the normal tobacco was in strawberry flavour while the premium smoke is mango scent.
pop* pop* pop*.. cautiously taking small puffs becos i dont know how lethal this stuff is. pop* pop* pop* pop* again. more whiff and smells so sweet. emm.. like mango aroma coming out of your breath. the bubbling water pops when you suck the pipe for the smoke.
pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*
pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*
i can tell you, the thing is 3% lethal. a way distant cousin of the normal cigarette. it is all hype and nothing more. so it is just some funny thing people do to idle around. unlike acient china man with the real opium pipe, this form of idlling does NOTHING to you. so next time, people ask if you shishaed? you can say ;"you mean you do?" and laugh. haha. no lah, it was quite a fun experience just that it was all hyped up and nothing to shout about. haha. it is just like bubble tea.
k, today i went to UFM100.3 and WKRZ's office to discuss a project we are doing. i must tell you, the people there are fantastic. they are so humble, knowledgeable (is my spelling correct?), anyway-- they are simply very focused, clear headed and level headed. all charged up with life. i like them. even the anchor DJ held no airs. really do hope that we find our desperately-seeked-sponsor soon. you know, my company dreamt of a programme, went to one stat board to propose our idea, they love it, approved it, endorsed it and we ran it. but we couldnt fly becos no sponsors said yes. yet. so it is pretty stressful for us, calling them, meeting them, talk and be hopeful but have not got one that say:"come, here's $10,000"
for your info, we need ten of them to say that.
so let's just say that we pray a lot.
then came the highly anticipated shisha.
it looks glorious, with lots of accessories, sparkle, in a green glass and a long suspiciously looking tube. the waiter distributed to each of us a personal filter.
(so that you dont suck on each other's saliva)
the waiter asked if we want the normal tobacco or the premium one.
we ordered one each. the normal tobacco was in strawberry flavour while the premium smoke is mango scent.
pop* pop* pop*.. cautiously taking small puffs becos i dont know how lethal this stuff is. pop* pop* pop* pop* again. more whiff and smells so sweet. emm.. like mango aroma coming out of your breath. the bubbling water pops when you suck the pipe for the smoke.
pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*
pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*pop* pop* pop*
i can tell you, the thing is 3% lethal. a way distant cousin of the normal cigarette. it is all hype and nothing more. so it is just some funny thing people do to idle around. unlike acient china man with the real opium pipe, this form of idlling does NOTHING to you. so next time, people ask if you shishaed? you can say ;"you mean you do?" and laugh. haha. no lah, it was quite a fun experience just that it was all hyped up and nothing to shout about. haha. it is just like bubble tea.
k, today i went to UFM100.3 and WKRZ's office to discuss a project we are doing. i must tell you, the people there are fantastic. they are so humble, knowledgeable (is my spelling correct?), anyway-- they are simply very focused, clear headed and level headed. all charged up with life. i like them. even the anchor DJ held no airs. really do hope that we find our desperately-seeked-sponsor soon. you know, my company dreamt of a programme, went to one stat board to propose our idea, they love it, approved it, endorsed it and we ran it. but we couldnt fly becos no sponsors said yes. yet. so it is pretty stressful for us, calling them, meeting them, talk and be hopeful but have not got one that say:"come, here's $10,000"
for your info, we need ten of them to say that.
so let's just say that we pray a lot.
Monday, March 21, 2005
critical mass
i have finally reached critical mass. ive reached the point where i fret not
(here's talking about my overwhelmed feelings about work every monday)
there is this inner strength that has popped up inside me.
a more balanced sense that i can handle this.
so, yes =) i am glad that i was pushed to do things i didnt have the
confidence to do. initially it felt frightening, pulling the whole show.
but now, im glad to have learnt the ropes here and there.
so now i can do more? haha.
k, work aside.
you know, i am quite a mental person. mentally not very sound.
i am a people person for sure, i love to be with my friends,
my beloved cousins and relatives (though i must say that some of
my aunts are very naggy). but yes, i am quite mental.
you see, after 3 hours at a facial + massage, i would be very happy when i check my mobile phone and see that there are no missed calls. it is idiot and i think i am pathetic to even have an ounce of happiness just becos there is no one looking for me.
you see, i am a very private person. i love to be alone. i love to read alone, practise piano alone, suntan with maximum 2 friends (unless on holiday-- then it depends, could be 5,6,7,8 people it's fine), day dream alone. write in my diary, pack my bag, listen to music, read papers. etc etc all alone. i need alot of down time per se. and for heaven's sake i cannot say,,,, do some "alone thing" knowing that i have to go on another appt, or that someone's waiting for me. so ya, when i am done with 3hrs of facial, i am happy that i was not needed somewhere by someone. you see, i have the big issue with people needing me. i am afraid of ppe needing me becos it is me who never want to need anyone. call it the teochew stubborness. whatever. i am really an independent person and when i do ask for help, i must have been in dire state to have asked. i dont quite get it too. i think i am too rigid a person. recently i learnt a lesson about asking. i was foolish to think that there is no price in asking for a gift. my aunt touched 4D and i asked her to buy me something. she happily bought it for me. few weeks later, she said,"next time you touch 4D, dont forget about me". well i am not ready for this. i dont like conditional favours. and i was the sucker who asked for the deal in the first place. thinking that there is unconditional gifts. you see, the very strange thing about me is that whatever that is in "my model of the world" i.e. whatever that is "norm" for me, i thought that that is the basic understanding for everyone i deem close to me. for instance, if i touch big 4D, i would buy something for someone for free. free of any condition. as long as it is being appreciated and being asked of (as long as there is a value to the act). i wont think of a return. isnt that how things are? i was so embarassed when my aunt asked that i return a favour in future. had i known that that is her expectation, i wouldnt want a grain of sand. foolish me.
recently a friend asked me if she should have sex with a man she is infatuated with. i said:"how can you ask me such a question?" "what do you want me to answer?"
if i say yes, she will say that "oh, then im sending a wrong message that i am a loose woman." if i say no, she will say "oh but i am never see him again"
blah. can i for the record say that dont ask me such freaking questions when what ever answer is NOT RIGHT. i know that if i say here "dont freaking waste my time", you may get me wrong thinking i am snobbish. so let me tell you the background.
my friend, who is 30 not 13 is suddenly head over heels over an ABC. she felt ashamed to have made the first move by opening the conversation. what day and age is it? i said she can jolly well wait for the rabbit to fall from the sky and let the chance go by. in short, with my step-by-step guidance, my friend managed to have "open communication channels" -ie email and sms with the guy she likes. then they guy called her before stepping into his house upon returning to his home town (overseas). he was afraid if he got home, his mom would grab him, leaving him no time to call my friend. and my friend called to ask me if this is good or bad. duh.
i REFUSE to give an answer. if i say oh that is a good sign, he wanna talk to you before his mommy dearest!, my friend would say oh but that doesnt mean he likes me.
so ya i sreamed. no i didnt la. i sighed and said:"isnt that obvious?" and "i cant tell you if he likes you becos i am not him and i cant design your life, your destiny, i can only tell you that you can choose to LIVE the moment, enjoy your infatuation while it lasts becos it doesnt come easy" (knowing my friend who is one who doesnt just get head over heels with any dick).
whatever the case. pls dont call and sigh into the phone EVERYTIME you call me. becos as much as i am aunt agony, i am not enjoying it 24-7. and for goodness' sake pls dont call my name in vain. i absolutely hate that.
had my friend want to increase her chances of becoming friends with that chap, i would gladly brainstorm all ideas with her. being friends 101, she can count on me on that. but she is not active in making things happen for herself. she just wanna sigh. and say what if what if. so pls, i could only listen to the SAME problem three times. the forth session warrants blatant remarks that i warn: may hurt.
=)
(here's talking about my overwhelmed feelings about work every monday)
there is this inner strength that has popped up inside me.
a more balanced sense that i can handle this.
so, yes =) i am glad that i was pushed to do things i didnt have the
confidence to do. initially it felt frightening, pulling the whole show.
but now, im glad to have learnt the ropes here and there.
so now i can do more? haha.
k, work aside.
you know, i am quite a mental person. mentally not very sound.
i am a people person for sure, i love to be with my friends,
my beloved cousins and relatives (though i must say that some of
my aunts are very naggy). but yes, i am quite mental.
you see, after 3 hours at a facial + massage, i would be very happy when i check my mobile phone and see that there are no missed calls. it is idiot and i think i am pathetic to even have an ounce of happiness just becos there is no one looking for me.
you see, i am a very private person. i love to be alone. i love to read alone, practise piano alone, suntan with maximum 2 friends (unless on holiday-- then it depends, could be 5,6,7,8 people it's fine), day dream alone. write in my diary, pack my bag, listen to music, read papers. etc etc all alone. i need alot of down time per se. and for heaven's sake i cannot say,,,, do some "alone thing" knowing that i have to go on another appt, or that someone's waiting for me. so ya, when i am done with 3hrs of facial, i am happy that i was not needed somewhere by someone. you see, i have the big issue with people needing me. i am afraid of ppe needing me becos it is me who never want to need anyone. call it the teochew stubborness. whatever. i am really an independent person and when i do ask for help, i must have been in dire state to have asked. i dont quite get it too. i think i am too rigid a person. recently i learnt a lesson about asking. i was foolish to think that there is no price in asking for a gift. my aunt touched 4D and i asked her to buy me something. she happily bought it for me. few weeks later, she said,"next time you touch 4D, dont forget about me". well i am not ready for this. i dont like conditional favours. and i was the sucker who asked for the deal in the first place. thinking that there is unconditional gifts. you see, the very strange thing about me is that whatever that is in "my model of the world" i.e. whatever that is "norm" for me, i thought that that is the basic understanding for everyone i deem close to me. for instance, if i touch big 4D, i would buy something for someone for free. free of any condition. as long as it is being appreciated and being asked of (as long as there is a value to the act). i wont think of a return. isnt that how things are? i was so embarassed when my aunt asked that i return a favour in future. had i known that that is her expectation, i wouldnt want a grain of sand. foolish me.
recently a friend asked me if she should have sex with a man she is infatuated with. i said:"how can you ask me such a question?" "what do you want me to answer?"
if i say yes, she will say that "oh, then im sending a wrong message that i am a loose woman." if i say no, she will say "oh but i am never see him again"
blah. can i for the record say that dont ask me such freaking questions when what ever answer is NOT RIGHT. i know that if i say here "dont freaking waste my time", you may get me wrong thinking i am snobbish. so let me tell you the background.
my friend, who is 30 not 13 is suddenly head over heels over an ABC. she felt ashamed to have made the first move by opening the conversation. what day and age is it? i said she can jolly well wait for the rabbit to fall from the sky and let the chance go by. in short, with my step-by-step guidance, my friend managed to have "open communication channels" -ie email and sms with the guy she likes. then they guy called her before stepping into his house upon returning to his home town (overseas). he was afraid if he got home, his mom would grab him, leaving him no time to call my friend. and my friend called to ask me if this is good or bad. duh.
i REFUSE to give an answer. if i say oh that is a good sign, he wanna talk to you before his mommy dearest!, my friend would say oh but that doesnt mean he likes me.
so ya i sreamed. no i didnt la. i sighed and said:"isnt that obvious?" and "i cant tell you if he likes you becos i am not him and i cant design your life, your destiny, i can only tell you that you can choose to LIVE the moment, enjoy your infatuation while it lasts becos it doesnt come easy" (knowing my friend who is one who doesnt just get head over heels with any dick).
whatever the case. pls dont call and sigh into the phone EVERYTIME you call me. becos as much as i am aunt agony, i am not enjoying it 24-7. and for goodness' sake pls dont call my name in vain. i absolutely hate that.
had my friend want to increase her chances of becoming friends with that chap, i would gladly brainstorm all ideas with her. being friends 101, she can count on me on that. but she is not active in making things happen for herself. she just wanna sigh. and say what if what if. so pls, i could only listen to the SAME problem three times. the forth session warrants blatant remarks that i warn: may hurt.
=)
Monday, March 14, 2005
monday scare
it happened again.
today, while walking to work, i pondered abt getting another job. perhaps just get a 9 to 5 job, i thought.
then i felt that it would be a waste of my life to be mundane.
but i really felt the urge to go find another job. perhaps something more secure. with cpf etc. and to get back my old pay scale.
then i remembered that instant gratification is not wise. and that investment (in a profession) would take toil of some form. plus i crave for learning. i've always liked to be challenged.
then it happened again.
in the evening, my colleague had a meeting with me on one proposal that we're putting up.
it's a small but very nicely furnished taiwanese restaurant that needs A&P -- advertising and promotion. in the midst of anther CEO breakfast forum that we are managing for our client.
and i felt alive again.
i dont like this pattern of mine. monday scare.
what is it that i am afraid of? that at the end of my productive life i realised too late that ive given the weight overly to work and little to family (planning)?
nah. my life is what i create, isn't it?
hence, in the midst of my very busy day, i slot in time for "Desperate Housewives", CSI
and trips to the beach, gathering with friends etc. and when i am ready, a baby or two.
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
where have i been?
been very busy. CNY was so much fun but i didnt have the time to even journal anything.
i had been stressed lately (but not since yesterday) as ive gotten over it.
work was the culprit. bidding for a product launch of a PDA with back end support. you cant imagine how much thinking goes into a pitch. of course we want the project, hence from field work to database profiling, to launch mechanics-- are basically a lot of work. and it's not good enough to wow our client. before CNY, we bid for one mega project ,, trying to create the singapore fire festival, but the client said no. too much money involved. but hey, they were the ones who said they've got quarter to a million to spend. so is that hot air or what. small scale seminar went well. that is easy job for me now that ive done a few of that. you know, queuing speakers and all. some speakers are even more nervous than me. my colleague assigned me to do emceeing. gosh, i cant for goodness sake. im SHORT, looks like a midget behind the podium. and i dont sound like a DJ for goodness. my voice is good for hypnosis and not to host an event. so i *siam *siam.. felt bad becos my colleague took up the job at the eleventh hour. she's good. she's good at anything. PR, presentation, hosting, research. anything. i always tell my husband that i PALE in comparison with my 2 colleagues. their wealth of experience is fabulous. that's why i feel pressured. becos i am expected to be just like them. they see no problem in me doing anything. not knowing that i feel utterly insecure. i tell myself that i should rise up to the challenge becos this is one great opportunity for me to double up, buck up, to bring my quotient higher. ya. but feeling lack in capability is not a good feeling. panicky may i add. luckily, they are nice ppe. they dont make me feel any less worthy or be impatient with me. that is what i really appreciate about them. once i got the proposals out, it was relief. well, till the client comes back and say - "you got the job!",, i'll leave the worrying till then. as it is, there are 2 other projects in-hand. F3- Fun, Fit & Fabulous! 2005. our brain child. joint organiser HPB-- health promo board. we are bringing entrepreneurship training into schools, weaving health messages into it. 3 mega event days in 3 different schools. seek sponsorship, brief contractors, source for DJ stint, trainers, st john ambulance, sports council... you're bored i know.
one memorable thing abt CNY is that my cousin is out. from prison.
starting life anew, after being foolish. you know, it is easy to think that you can get away with anything if you've thought of all loopholes and covered them.
we had so much fun playing the silly 24 card game. you know-- you can + - X divide all four cards on the table to arrive at number 24. and another game where we mix any form of sauce- chilli, tomato, soya sauce, pepper, with pepsi, yeo's drinks and 7up whatever. looser gotta drink up. bottoms up no cheating. my cousie's wife is sporting. she drank a super awful concoction. thumbs up! glad she's family. hahaha.
i had been stressed lately (but not since yesterday) as ive gotten over it.
work was the culprit. bidding for a product launch of a PDA with back end support. you cant imagine how much thinking goes into a pitch. of course we want the project, hence from field work to database profiling, to launch mechanics-- are basically a lot of work. and it's not good enough to wow our client. before CNY, we bid for one mega project ,, trying to create the singapore fire festival, but the client said no. too much money involved. but hey, they were the ones who said they've got quarter to a million to spend. so is that hot air or what. small scale seminar went well. that is easy job for me now that ive done a few of that. you know, queuing speakers and all. some speakers are even more nervous than me. my colleague assigned me to do emceeing. gosh, i cant for goodness sake. im SHORT, looks like a midget behind the podium. and i dont sound like a DJ for goodness. my voice is good for hypnosis and not to host an event. so i *siam *siam.. felt bad becos my colleague took up the job at the eleventh hour. she's good. she's good at anything. PR, presentation, hosting, research. anything. i always tell my husband that i PALE in comparison with my 2 colleagues. their wealth of experience is fabulous. that's why i feel pressured. becos i am expected to be just like them. they see no problem in me doing anything. not knowing that i feel utterly insecure. i tell myself that i should rise up to the challenge becos this is one great opportunity for me to double up, buck up, to bring my quotient higher. ya. but feeling lack in capability is not a good feeling. panicky may i add. luckily, they are nice ppe. they dont make me feel any less worthy or be impatient with me. that is what i really appreciate about them. once i got the proposals out, it was relief. well, till the client comes back and say - "you got the job!",, i'll leave the worrying till then. as it is, there are 2 other projects in-hand. F3- Fun, Fit & Fabulous! 2005. our brain child. joint organiser HPB-- health promo board. we are bringing entrepreneurship training into schools, weaving health messages into it. 3 mega event days in 3 different schools. seek sponsorship, brief contractors, source for DJ stint, trainers, st john ambulance, sports council... you're bored i know.
one memorable thing abt CNY is that my cousin is out. from prison.
starting life anew, after being foolish. you know, it is easy to think that you can get away with anything if you've thought of all loopholes and covered them.
we had so much fun playing the silly 24 card game. you know-- you can + - X divide all four cards on the table to arrive at number 24. and another game where we mix any form of sauce- chilli, tomato, soya sauce, pepper, with pepsi, yeo's drinks and 7up whatever. looser gotta drink up. bottoms up no cheating. my cousie's wife is sporting. she drank a super awful concoction. thumbs up! glad she's family. hahaha.
Monday, January 31, 2005
JAN 2005
it is amazing how MLM (multi level marketing) can bring a family closer. well, at least my aunties seem to be genuinely benefitting from the very expensive "health restoring girdle business".
their aches (back aches, leg pain, etc) are deminishing and they are all surprised at the good effects. even my grandpa wears the socks that strategically depresses the shin, calf and soles and he says he could walk all day without feeling tired. my aunt swears by it when she goes shopping.
i feel adverse abt MLM becos i feel that most of the prodts are OVER priced.
but of course they claim that any other prodt of equivalence would be more expensive.
im thru with these talks becos ive been thru a dozen of different MLMs and im wasted.
no, i should say i've learnt a lot from the system and i know what works and what does not.
we have been populated with MLM since early 90s and many "friends" whom you thought were dead resurfaced.
they are taught to say that they wanna share what is good with you. or that how they have just made a couple of thousands doing a "no capital down" start up business.
you get my drift.
pls dont mistaken me. im a MLM prodt user. i use nu skin's marine mud, and sometimes the liquid foundation. i use belair's aroma oil and amway's dish washer detergent and many other MLM stuff that i tried and tested workable..
just that i dont like it when ppe keep poaching.
poaching = to encroach, to invade intrude impinge infringe and down right don't take NO for an answer.
i am very patient with ppe like that it's just that they waste my mobile fee.
but wait-- im now in the circle again. the MLM circle. ya,,, that very expensive "healthy girdle" thing. i've ordered a set (!!!!!) and im gonna be "victorian" underneath. you know, there is a reason (a logical reason) why women in the olden days wear girdles. if we dont structure our fats to go to the right places, they would conveniently go to the wrong places. but im honestly LAZY. hence i really dont know if this will be a fad for me.
their aches (back aches, leg pain, etc) are deminishing and they are all surprised at the good effects. even my grandpa wears the socks that strategically depresses the shin, calf and soles and he says he could walk all day without feeling tired. my aunt swears by it when she goes shopping.
i feel adverse abt MLM becos i feel that most of the prodts are OVER priced.
but of course they claim that any other prodt of equivalence would be more expensive.
im thru with these talks becos ive been thru a dozen of different MLMs and im wasted.
no, i should say i've learnt a lot from the system and i know what works and what does not.
we have been populated with MLM since early 90s and many "friends" whom you thought were dead resurfaced.
they are taught to say that they wanna share what is good with you. or that how they have just made a couple of thousands doing a "no capital down" start up business.
you get my drift.
pls dont mistaken me. im a MLM prodt user. i use nu skin's marine mud, and sometimes the liquid foundation. i use belair's aroma oil and amway's dish washer detergent and many other MLM stuff that i tried and tested workable..
just that i dont like it when ppe keep poaching.
poaching = to encroach, to invade intrude impinge infringe and down right don't take NO for an answer.
i am very patient with ppe like that it's just that they waste my mobile fee.
but wait-- im now in the circle again. the MLM circle. ya,,, that very expensive "healthy girdle" thing. i've ordered a set (!!!!!) and im gonna be "victorian" underneath. you know, there is a reason (a logical reason) why women in the olden days wear girdles. if we dont structure our fats to go to the right places, they would conveniently go to the wrong places. but im honestly LAZY. hence i really dont know if this will be a fad for me.
whatever the case, i still feel that wearing a girdle would be safer then going for "meso" jab... one from the doctor. the chemical would dislodge those fatty blocks that are clinging onto your tyre-like abdomen, or your thick arms. you'll be slim in 3 days. my friend lost an inch on her waistline. real people, real results. sometimes i feel sick that i am on the verge to do something like that. you know, i am against plastic surgery for myself, hence, anything that is foreign to the body would be a no-no for me. to think that i wanted meso therapy is bothering me.... when did i give in to vanity? i have alway been a believer that we should love our body in whatever shape and size, carve it the "hard" way-- exercise, do tonning, no pain no gain. but look at me,,, i had considered the easy way out. to think that i was angry when Koh Ching Mun did the expression ad (dont know if it was expression or some other slimming saloon) but i was angry that Koh, someone i thought quite highly of, would give in to do a slimming ad. i had thought that she was the role model of a modern woman- confident, self-sufficient, comfortable in her body in whatever shape and size. where was the determination? then it DAWNED on me that i was angry with myself, not her. i had thought that i was a role model, with determination, sheer hard-work-pays-off, confident, kind of persona but i was disappointed with myself when i gave in and started planning for meso. aka- the easy way out.
i cant say for sure that i wont attempt to do meso in future, but for now-- i am aware of my insecurities. i am opting for the girdle for the time being and shall let you know if it has any impact in my life. baring it all for you.
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
Monday, January 24, 2005
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